Free Fridays: Then and now.

21 November 2025

I stared at the floor, scratching my head. I looked at the four pairs of shoes among the mess, and they stared back at me. Please pack us with you, they whispered to me. I can’t not bring them. Different shoes for different outfits. I’m not posting on socials, yes, but I need to look put together for me!

I was packing for the trip and was having a hard time choosing my outfits. Fadza packed in five minutes, much to my envy. A few shirts, a couple jackets, sneakers, done. Men have it so easy.

“Just pack them all,” Fadza said, rolling his eyes at me and my shoes.

“But we only have 30kg allowance,” I replied.

“It’s ok. We’ll weigh everything and see if you need to leave some things behind.”

I packed all four shoes, and completed my outfits – even some backup ones. Zipped up my suitcase and passed it to Fadza. He was ready to get on the weighing scale with it. The moment of truth is about to come.

Please don’t be overweight, please don’t be overweight, I whispered to my suitcase.

“Oh, wow, it’s 15kg!” Fadza exclaimed, astonished.

Huh? Never in my life have I packed half the baggage allowance. Usually, it’s 29.9kg.

“You’re joking!” I said, running to see the number of the scales.

It was 15kg.

What?!

I… underpacked?

Oh….

I realised after a while why it was so light this time.

You see, all these while, our “holidays” have never really been real holidays. When you’re an entrepreneur, everything becomes an opportunity for the business, so everywhere I went, I would have to take content for the business.

There was always a scarf collection from dUCk that was launching every month, so wherever I went, I would pack up the entire collection with me – each scarf had a different outfit head to toe. So if it was 7 colours, that means 14 scarves (7 square, 7 shawl). That would mean 14 different outfits, sometimes 14 different handbags to pair with each look. I would be the model, makeup artist and stylist. Fadza would be the route planner and photographer. We would create campaign photos for dUCk – Fadza and I photographing like mad, changing clothes and scarf in any available corner, cramming it all in three days. (Our holidays were never more than 3-4 days, we could never stay away from the office that long)

The actual ”holiday” was never a priority – the priority was shooting the collection. I can’t think of a single trip that we didn’t use the opportunity to take content for FV or dUCk. Even if the kids were there, they obediently waited on pavements as Mom and Dad took the photos. We’d come back with suitcases full of outfits that I had to prove to the customs officers that these 14 handbags were not imported!

So this time, it was very different. I don’t have dUCk anymore and I had nothing to sell or market. So I was packing for... just a normal holiday. There were no 14 different scarves or 14 different handbags or 14 different shoes (just 4 this time…).

It was not a 29.9kg suitcase anymore.

Fadza and I laughed together. It was… refreshing, I guess. The bag was light. But I felt weird!

You mean, we can just go on this trip and not work?!

I can stand in front of the mountain and not pose… so I just look at it?

I get to just enjoy the tourist things, and not sell anything?

I get to just enjoy this trip? I felt so guilty! It felt… selfish. 😂 And to be honest, a bit empty.

Even in Bosnia, I asked Fadza, “Oooh, nice building! Can you take a picture of my scarf from the back angle, please?” as I posed immediately.

“Uhh… what for?”

I snapped back after I realised omg I don’t have to do that anymore.

It was so foreign to me to not work during my travels, after 15 years of being obsessed with sales targets and marketing. There was no rest as an entrepreneur and that was the norm for us – we aren’t complaining btw, it was just a different time. But this era, we had no scarf collection to sell and it was… different. I had to adjust to this slower and calmer pace of traveling.

In Istanbul, we passed by the spots that we went to take shots of the Unity dUCk collection in 2019. Sharing the photos from our memories:

We both pointed out memories from those spots – stressed that we couldn’t get the wind to cooperate, asking strangers to move so we can get a clean shot, me squatting on the floor styling the next scarf. And we both smiled at each other – grateful to have had a chance to shoot that collection together, and grateful also to be here again to purely admire God’s creations all around this city.

Sharing also our then and now photos:

Then and now, 2019 and 2025.

Two people standing at the same spot, separated by six years and in completely different seasons of life. In 2019, we were young and ambitious, at the peak of our careers. In 2025, we’re in a quieter chapter – jobless, learning to rebuild again. Yet in both moments, our smiles were present.

Because gratitude carried us then, and gratitude carries us now.

Truly, wherever God places you, no matter the circumstances, there is always beauty that He wants you to see. We plan, but God also plans, and He is the Best of Planners. So embrace every era with an open heart - then and now.

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Before you go…

Let me know you’ve read this. Comment “Fadza’s cheeks tho…😂” on my latest post at @sincerelyvivy.

See you there! :)